


I look at you and I'm home

by Kumikirin



Series: Cold hands, warm hearts [1]
Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Childhood Friends, DenNor Christmas Week, Established Relationship, Fluff, Human Names Used, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-04-15
Packaged: 2018-06-02 10:17:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6562414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kumikirin/pseuds/Kumikirin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[For the DenNor Christmas Week on Tumblr; Prompt: Childhood Friends] Lukas and Matthias take a moment on Christmas Eve's morning to remember some previous Christmases spent together as kids.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I look at you and I'm home

**Author's Note:**

> Denmark is Matthias  
> Norway is Lukas  
> Iceland is Emil

Cold mornings are a thing in Scandinavia, especially when it's Christmas Eve. Matthias, being the excited child he is on the inside, is already up by seven. The fact that he's a morning person also helps; he's been awake since six in the morning, but Lukas' warm body and peaceful expression were reason enough to stay in bed a little more, tracing invisible patterns on his exposed shoulder.

When the 6:59 on the clock turns to a 7:00, the Dane slips out of bed as carefully as he can and goes downstairs to prepare breakfast for him and his boyfriend. It takes a dark and concentrated coffee to wake Lukas up so early in the morning, but they have things to do today and, as much as he wants to look at Lukas while he sleeps (Emil would call him a creep if he heard him), he has to wake him up. Setting the coffee mugs and some cinnamon rolls on a tray, Matthias makes his way upstairs and carefully opens the door of his and Lukas' room.

Lukas has never been a morning person, it usually takes some effort to wake him up, and so it's a real surprise for Matthias to find him already awake and sitting on the bed. True, he looks like he's more asleep than awake, and his closed eyes only enforce the idea of him falling asleep again while sitting, but as Matthias approaches a soft creak on the wooden floor alerts his boyfriend, who slowly opens his royal purple eyes to look at him. Matthias knows better than to talk to a just awakened Lukas, and because of that he silently sits at his side and puts the tray on the Norwegian's lap, lifting his mug for him so he finally notices the coffee and holds it tightly while looking at the dark liquid as if trying to decipher humanity's deepest secrets.

"I was thinking," Lukas' raspy voice instantly catches Matthias' attention after a while in silence. He's been waiting for him to start talking when he no longer feels murderous. "About the photos we were looking at yesterday. The Christmas ones," the clarification isn't needed, Matthias knows what Lukas is talking about. Still, he nods, and with a soft laugh bends down to kiss Lukas' cheek.

"Good morning to you too, honey," he says, a bit sarcastically and a bit amused, because Lukas rarely remembers to say good morning. "What about that?"

"Good morning," Lukas repeats without hesitation, a reflex that he's developed with time. It never fails to make him look adorable in Matthias' eyes, because he's still looking ahead with sleepy eyes and a frown, appearing as if keeping awake is taking all his focus. "What about what?"

Yeah, he's not fully awake yet.

"What about the photos," Matthias repeats, sipping from his own cup of coffee while looking at his boyfriend from the corner of his eye.

"Oh," Lukas blinks slowly, like he's trying to reconnect the strands of his thinking process. He slowly rises his cup to his lips, drinking without looking anywhere but at the wall in front of him. Judging by the angle in which he's tilting the mug, Matthias can tell he's emptying it, and his suspicions prove to be right when he feels Lukas resting against his side, letting his weight be held by him. Matthias waits patiently until he feels the still warm mug softly colliding with his chest, in what he's long since recognized as Lukas' silent (and totally cute) way of asking for more coffee. He hasn't touched his cinnamon roll, and won't until he's downed at least half of his second cup. After three years of living with Lukas and other two of dating him, one could expect Matthias to know his lover's antics by heart.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll get back in a second," he leaves a kiss on Lukas' cheek before getting up. He can't help it, his boyfriend is the most adorable thing on Earth when he's trying to wake up, and he doesn't complain if he showers him in kisses and affection. "Don't steal mine!" he warns, before disappearing through the door.

He expects to find Lukas in the exact same position when he gets back, so he's once more surprised when he sees him staring at an open photo album, the one they had left on the bedside table before going to sleep last night. He walks up to the bed and sits, handing Lukas his coffee, which he gladly accepts, and looking down to see which photo his boyfriend is analyzing now.

"I was thinking about the photos," Lukas repeats, and he looks a little more centered now that the caffeine is starting to kick in, "This one, specifically. Do you remember it?"

Matthias sends a quick glance in the direction of his coffee mug, noticing that it's a little emptier than before he left, and smiling discreetly as he finally fixes his sky-blue eyes on the photography that Lukas is showing him. Memories flood his mind instantly.

"Of course I do. That's the first time we spent Christmas far from each other," he points at the picture with his index finger, resting the tip on the paper as if that gesture enhanced his words. "Your parents took you to visit your aunt for Christmas, and when you called me on Christmas morning I heard the radio behind you."

Lukas nods and stares at the photo for a couple of seconds.

"Ever since we met, we've been spending Christmas together in one way or another. I remember I was really disappointed when my mother told me we were breaking the tradition that year," Lukas taps his fingers rhythmically against his already half-empty mug, ignoring his boyfriend's mocking 'aww'. "How old were we? Like eight, right?"

"Mh. Around that age, yeah," Matthias shakes his head in a way that indicates that he's not completely sure, but he thinks it's probably the most accurate option, "You were telling me something about Emil playing in the snow without his mittens, and I interrupted you because I could hear the Christmas carols behind your voice."

Taking small bites off his cinnamon roll, Lukas nods in agreement to that memory. He can recall that day in a special way, because he felt connected to Matthias despite the distance, and that gave him a warm feeling that wasn't easy to forget.

"Your mother always put the same radio program every Christmas, and my aunt happened to be listening to it too," he licks a little sugar and cinnamon that was on his upper lip before going on. "It felt like home, I didn't feel so alone after hearing those songs. Knowing that we were listening to them together was the best part."

Matthias nods, sliding his finger across the picture, which shows a young and small Lukas holding a telephone against his ear. He looks stern for a kid, with those thin lips frozen in the middle of a word and those delicate eyebrows drawn together in a frown, but his eyes glint with something special. Matthias likes to think it's the feeling that years later evolved into love.

"It's strange, don't you think? How we're not together on this photo, yet we are."

Lukas stops before he can bite his cinnamon roll, moving it away from his mouth to talk.

"I think that it captured the essence of the moment. We weren't together in a physical way, but with that radio broadcast and that call we were together in other ways," he shrugs like he wants to take some seriousness away from his words, and finally bites and chews again.

"You're so sweet, Lukey," Matthias chants, laughing and taking a good bite of his own pastry.

Lukas lifts his mug to his lips once again, at the same time lifting his gaze to look at the taller man in an unamused way. The target of the glare, instead of noticing it, is focused on the other pictures of the album.

"Remember this one?" he points at a photo in the other album page, one that shows both boys in heavy coats and carrying bags of various colors, which the blonde remembers were full of Christmas gifts. He's smiling widely while Lukas keeps his face more relaxed. "We went out with our fathers to buy presents for everyone."

Lukas takes his eyes away from the picture for a second, just to look at his lover and arch an eyebrow at him.

"What I remember is that you insisted on taking photos of me with your parents' camera, thinking that I didn't notice," he rolls his eyes and sips from his mug, pushing back some strands of hair once he's done drinking. Matthias notices that, knowing that Lukas is starting to be bothered by his own hair once more. That happens every time he goes long without his barrette.

Matthias smiles and stretches so he can grab Lukas' hairclip from his nightstand, going back to his previous position and gently lifting his lover's face to put the barrette on his hair, getting the blond strands off his face. Lukas lets him, just closing his eyes and not complaining at all. He secretly likes it when Matthias spoils him like this.

"That was until you told me that, if I was gonna take so many photos of you, I could at least be in one of them," he resumes the talk once he's clipped Lukas' hair, caressing it with the tips of his fingers for a short moment before dropping his hand. His eyes go back to the photo and he silently stares at it for a moment, taking in the details, but more than anything he's looking at Lukas, trying to remember if by that time he already acknowledged how beautiful he was. "Hey, how come you were so cute when you were little? I mean, you're still cute, but…" Matthias trails off, running his index finger along the edge of the picture.

"Emil was cuter," the smaller man replies with simplicity, looking at the photo without seeing anything outstanding regarding his appearance. Blonde hair a little lighter than now, much shorter, and rounder face, but that was it. A normal kid.

"But he isn't on this photo. He had to be around by then, though, we were like nine here."

"Yes, he was around four, and he didn't come with us because he was too young and he'd get easily tired. At least I think my mother said that, and he stayed with her," licking his lips once more, Lukas savours the bitterness of coffee and spiciness of cinnamon. "Speaking of Emil, is he still asleep?"

Matthias looks towards the door and then shifts on the bed, moving closer to Lukas. Emil would normally be away, since he's attending college in another city, but he comes back for the holidays and stays with them. Lukas always insists on that, and everyone knows that, even if Emil complains about how bothersome and clingy his big brother can be, he likes staying with them.

"Probably. You know how he is in the morning, just like you," he remarks with a side smile. That's just one of the many things the brothers have in common. Some people say they don't see the resemblance, while others claim that they really look alike, but for the ones that really know them the connection between them is undeniable. It goes further than the similar shape of their eyes, and it's deeper than the way their noses curve just slightly at the tip. It goes down to their gestures, the way they gesticulate with their hands when talking, the posture they take when they're angry, their shared like for black coffee and, of course, the fact that neither of them is totally alive when they just wake up.

Lukas hums, hiding his mouth behind his mug, and Matthias knows he's smiling and probably repeating his words inside his head. He loves it when someone tells him that he and Emil have something in common, since he takes big pride on his little brother.

"I remember one time he was in a photo with us. I love that one," he says, after swallowing the remains of his coffee. He rummages through the pages of the album until he finds the one he's looking for. "Here, you remember this?"

With the excuse of getting a better look of the photo, Matthias approaches his lover a little more, sneaking one arm behind his back and resting it over the mattress in order to hold his weight as he leans to the side. Being slightly behind Lukas, he leans forward to look over his shoulder. Lukas doesn't say anything about the closeness, and even lifts the album a little so his lover can see better.

The picture shows a group of five little kids, all of various hues of blond, standing around a table while decorating cookies with colored frosting. Four of them are about the same height and appear to be around ten years old, while the other one is noticeably smaller and doesn't look much older than five. He's also the lighter blond of all of them.

"This is from one of the times we made cookies with Tino's parents," Matthias immediately states, recognizing the occasion. "Woah, I remembered that Emil's hair was white, but not that white."

"It's not like it's changed so much since then."

"Well, it's not this bright nowadays. He's more like a really, really light platinum blonde now. This was blinding white."

"All of us had lighter hair when we were little kids, you know how blonde hair is," lots of people are mesmerized by how light Emil's hair is, and how it used to be pristine white back in the day, but Lukas has never found it that strange. Maybe because he never cared too much about it.

"True," Matthias rests his head on Lukas shoulder, still looking at the photo. He can recall his competition with Berwald about who could make the best cookie. Emil was the judge, but he ended up giving the first prize to his older brother because he really admired him at that time. The memory makes him smile, and brings other memories back, of similar occasions during other Christmases. "Hey, we have older photos from this, don't we? I mean, we've made cookies at Tino's place since we were like five," as he talks, Matthias turns the pages going backwards. The photos get progressively older, showing younger and younger versions of themselves, and he quickly gets to the one he was looking for. "This one. This was the first time Tino's parents invited us over to decorate the cookies. Look at you, you're a mess," he points out, smiling.

"And whose fault was that?" Lukas remarks, but at the same time leans against Matthias' firm chest. That question holds no malice. "You were the one who started to paint my face with frosting."

"Red looks good on you," is all the justification Matthias has to offer.

"And you look good with my foot on your face, but you don't see me kicking you," Lukas retorts without having to think too much. This kind of responses flow naturally when it's about Matthias.

"Hey, you can't know, you've never put your feet on my face."

"Oh, I have. In my imagination."

Matthias hates how Lukas wins this arguments.

"… either way, you also painted me with frosting, so I'm not the only one to blame."

"It was on self-defense," Lukas justifies, looking at their round faces covered with brush strokes of red, white and green frosting. They're smiling on the photo, he can remember Mrs. Väinämöinen's laughter when she saw them like that. "Tino's mother made us make a cookie for each other after that. Like some sort of peace offering."

A laugh bubbles inside Matthias' chest and finally comes out his parted lips, making his shoulders shake. He sneaks his free hand around Lukas' waist and uses it to press him tighter against his chest, earning a grunt from him.

"Dane, you're too close," he growls, sounding like a cat who's being held by its tail, and that's how Matthias knows his free pass to touch Lukas has expired. He's finally conscious enough to be able to complain about the invasion of his personal space.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just that I love you so much that I want to be always close to you," he resists the urge to kiss him again, and gives him a little space instead. It wouldn't be good to start Christmas Eve's morning by making his boyfriend mad at him.

He doesn't move too far, though, only some centimeters so that Lukas won't feel too annoyed. Lukas promptly resigns and lets his back rest against his boyfriend's chest once more, moving the tray from his lap to the bed so he can bend his legs up towards his chest and lift the album higher, bringing it closer to his face. He's snuggling against Matthias, like a cat that gets tired of being petted and bites the hand that's caressing him, but then sits on its owner's lap wanting some more attention.

"I was taller than you," Lukas comments in his mellow voice, and that sentence alone would seem random if it wasn't accompanied by one slim finger pointing at another photography.

This photo in particular is from one day Matthias remembers well, because it was the first time he and Lukas got to pick the Christmas tree together for the first time. They were seven years old, at most, bundled up in warm snow boots and cozy coats, with their necks and faces protected by woolen scarves and tiny hands hidden by colorful mittens. Both families had gone in one group to select their Christmas pine, letting the small boys choose which tree they would be taking home. Matthias was so excited that he kept pointing at any tree every three steps, while Lukas was totally focused on finding the biggest, greenest and strongest pine. In the end, Lukas had to help his friend by suggesting him a tree that met his own standards, and Matthias had agreed that it was the perfect Christmas tree for his family.

The photography pictures two good-sized trees lying on the snow-covered ground, and between them the childhood friends stand smiling. As Lukas said, he was at least four or five centimeters taller.

"And now look at us. I'm like half a head taller than you," Matthias wraps his arm around his boyfriend once again, but this time Lukas doesn't growl in annoyance, just shakes his head to get the Dane's hair out of his face. "The shorter child who ends up being the taller of the two when he grows up. What a cliché," he laughs, and Lukas lets his head fall slightly to the side to rest it on Matthias' shoulder.

"We're childhood friends who ended up as lovers. We're the biggest cliché ever, dear," he remarks with a tinge of sarcasm in his tone, a short and soft laugh coming from his throat but not quite reaching his lips.

Before Matthias can add anything else, Lukas closes the album and sets it aside, pinching his boyfriend's hands in order to free himself of the hug. He gets out of bed, careful not to knock the tray to the floor, and stretches as he welcomes the chill of the morning. Matthias walks up to his side of the bed and reaches for the tray, but Lukas snatches it out of his hands.

"You brought it here, now let me take it back to the kitchen," he says, and closes his eyes without hesitation as Matthias smiles, nods, and bends down for the morning kiss he never got.

Half an hour later, they're putting their coats on so they can finally go out and run some errands. Lukas leaves a note for Emil to let him know there's coffee and pastries in the kitchen, and sticks it on the table before leaving. Matthias is waiting for him at the door, ready to go, and Lukas walks hurriedly towards him. He stops, though, as he passes by the camera that's sitting on the counter near the door. An idea comes to his mind, and with a mischievous smile he takes the camera in his hands.

"How about a photo?" he suggests, waving the device in the air.

Agreeing with just an 'okay' and a laugh, Matthias closes the distance between them, holding Lukas by the waist and smiling as he points the camera lens at them. However, Lukas has other plans, and as he presses the snap button he takes his lover's face with his free hand, locking their lips together.

"This one goes for the album," he smirks, looking at the small screen on the camera, which shows a surprised Matthias with topaz blue eyes wide open. Lukas looks up only to be attacked by that same Dane, hungrily devouring his lips like every time they are alone below a mistletoe.

Putting Christmas photos from each year in the album is a tradition, one that started innocently and now is the loveliest way of telling the story of childhood friends who met when they were four, and twenty years later found themselves as lovers.

Some traditions should never change.


End file.
